


i'm tired

by woobff



Series: we'll be okay, soon [1]
Category: ATEEZ (Band)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mentions of Mental Illness, Self-Esteem Issues, protect jung wooyoung
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-13
Updated: 2019-07-13
Packaged: 2020-06-27 16:07:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,954
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19794331
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/woobff/pseuds/woobff
Summary: " what's wrong, young-ie? " he asked softly, thumb stroking the apple of the younger's cheeks." i'm tired, hyung"" of practice? "" of everything, hyung.  "





	i'm tired

**Author's Note:**

> okay hello! i'm back with another ateez work and i don't know if i'm allowed to be proud with how this turns out because i feel like it's lacking something but i'm too exhausted to add more. hence, i think this will be a series so :>
> 
> anyways, enjoy reading this. once again, this is me word vomiting emotions and using ateez as characters of my story and emotions.

" okay! good job guys! let's take ten, " hongjoong called out from his position next to the speaker, already gulping down his own water as he pressed pause on the stereo.

everyone groaned in relief before proceeding to go to their individual bags to freshen up be it drink up or eating a snack. 

except for wooyoung. the boy was still executing dance moves, the counting from his lips being the only music to accompany the dance moves. 

" young-ie, it's break time, " san called out, his eyebrows scrunched together in worry. 

" just five more minutes san, " came the raspy replied, making everyone look at him. 

" no, no more five minutes. jung wooyoung, you better stop _right now_ or i'll ban you from practicing for two days, " hongjoong ordered, feet already moving him towards the boy. 

and when hongjoong stood next to the younger he felt his heart cracked at every passing second.

because the younger was sweating profusely; the kind where you know it’s not only caused by physical exhaustion but also caused by mental exhaustion. and the fact that he can see how red his cheeks were, how labored his breathing was and how he was in an uncomfortable hunch to catch his breath. 

and when he cupped both of wooyoung's cheeks, turning his face to look into his eyes, he could see the tears pooling at his eyes.

" what's wrong, young- _ie_? " he asked softly, thumb stroking the apple of the younger's cheeks. 

" i'm tired, _hyung_ " 

" of practice? " 

" of everything, _hyung_. " wooyoung replies, head down in guilt and not a second later, his body was shaking followed by hiccups. 

hongjoong could hear the scurry of feet shuffling from the other side towards him and soon enough another figure was by his side, the worry practically oozing off from the other. 

" hey hey, baby it's okay. alright let it all out, _hyung_ got you, baby, i promise, " seonghwa said, pulling him into his embrace, hiding wooyoung's face to the crook of his neck. 

the older of the two could only rub small circles on the other’s back, mumbling comforting words to the crown of his head as he lets him cry out his pent up emotions, not once minding how the tears and snot were messing up against his neck.

by then, everyone had already stopped talking and is paying close attention to the hugging duo, hongjoong at the side rubbing small circles on the youngest's back. they’ve never seen wooyoung this vulnerable, this _broken_ before. they felt their heart wrenched up in pain as they saw how tightly the boy had bunched up the back of seonghwa’s shirt in his fist till his knuckles were white as the sounds of broken sobs filled the practice room.

" i-i’m so tired of not being good enough hyung. “ wooyoung’s soft voice confessed, “i don't know what's wrong with me the past few days. i can't focus, i feel sad all the time and it's affecting my focus so much h- _hyung_ , " he continues, followed by the sound of sniffling. 

" i'm not sharp enough with my steps. i can't do my popping properly. my arm movements aren't smooth anymore. hyung , make it stop. the thoughts are so loud, _i_ \- " and when wooyoung got cut off from his speech by the coughing fit that appears due to his crying, seonghwa couldn’t stop himself from letting a tear fall down his cheeks as he wrapped his arms around the younger impossibly tighter.

" young- _ie_ , " jungho starts, his voice wavering, 

" i hate myself, _hyung_ , " 

" jung wooyoung, stop it- " it’s yunho’s turn to try,

" i hate myself so mu-" 

" JUNG WOOYOUNG! " 

“ yeosang don’t- “

and then the boy was snatched out from seonghwa's embrace and was face to face with his angry best friend. 

his angry best friend who currently has tear tracks on his cheeks, the droplets of tears being its companion. 

" please wooyoung, you can't let that monster take you back, " yeosang sobbed, intertwining their hands together. he looks down at their hands, a small smile appearing on his face as he saw the size difference before he gave it a light squeeze and then looking back up. 

" you’ve gotten so strong, you've grown up so much, you can't let that _monster_ ruin you again, I won't let you, " he stepped closer to brush wooyoung’s cheeks with his free hand, " we promised to go through this together, didn't we? " 

wooyoung nodded, feeling a new set of tears rolling down before he stepped forward to hug his best friend. 

" you'll be okay wooyoung- _ie_. i promise that, " 

  
  
  
  
  


  
  


it was currently dinner time, and the group had decided to go for home-cooked dinner in which seonghwa was in charge of cooking and distributing the tasks to be done. 

" hongjoong-ah, can you, mingi and san help in doing the laundry? i think there are two baskets of wet clothes to be dried and one basket of dirty clothes, " said boys nodded before going to the laundry room, leaving the remaining members in the living room. 

wooyoung was currently resting his head on jongho's shoulder, the younger patting his head all the while playing with the other’s fingers knowing that it calms the boy down. 

" yunho and yeosang, you both will help me in the kitchen. jongho-ah please take care of young-ie for awhile " seonghwa finalizes with a soft kiss to both the boys' head. 

after that, it was silence beside the soft sniffles from wooyoung as he hides his face into jongho's chest, his fists balled up in an attempt to stop himself from crying more. 

from feeling _hurt_ more. 

" just cry it all out _hyung_ , " and that made the crying boy in hold sobbed louder, " letting out your emotions will help, i promise, " jongho added, his fingers gently carding through the older's hair. 

jongho had always teased the older for being the cry baby in the group. he had always laughed at wooyoung when he cries to his chest after a heartbreaking movie, cried when he broke the mug yunho had bought him for his birthday present. and that laughter was present due to the older’s adorable antics.

but _this_. this wasn’t what jongho had wanted. he didn’t want to see his hyung cry in pain into his chest. he couldn’t bear to hear the broken sobs the older lets out nor the way he has to continue hiccuping in order to regain his breathing because the crying fucks up with the way he breathes. 

" i hate feeling like this. it's exhausting a-and it's like there's another burden on top of me and i don't know how to remove it. " he hears wooyoung whispers, his voice shaky, 

" it's like it's back to square one and i hate it. make it stop, " wooyoung cries out, snuggling further into the younger’s chest to just search for comfort to stop the gnawing pain in him. 

and he continues to cry even when he hears the members enter the living room. 

he continues to cry even when he's moved from jongho's embrace to mingi’s. 

he continues to cry even when a pair of hands cupped his cheeks to make him look at the person infront, to have another focus. 

he continues to cry _even harder_ when san's fingers gently wiped away the tears on his cheeks and he could only lean to the touch and sobbed harder. 

" please just h-hold me for now, " wooyoung whispers and everyone just huddled closer, no words mentioned. 

  
  


  
  


they were currently in a circle, eating the fried rice that has been cooked, quietly, mindful of wooyoung who's finally soundly sleeping next to yunho, his hand fisting the hem of the older's shirt as an anchor.

" i'm worried, " mingi starts out, placing down his spoon to brush off the strand of hair from wooyoung's forehead. he could see the dried tear tracks on the younger’s cheeks, how his eyes already seemed swollen due to the hours of crying. 

" we're all worried, to be honest, " jungho said, his eyes focused at the boy in the topic. 

everyone has been walking on eggshells ever since the breakdown that occurred in the practice room hours prior. seeing their usual sunshine having a breakdown and looking so exhausted, pains them in ways they didn't know could. 

" i-i could tell what happen, he gave me permission, " a voice said making everyone look at the source just to come face to face with a tired yeosang whose eyes had already started welling up with tears.

a soft pat on his knee was all it took for yeosang to start. 

" we both went through this same shit before debut. the heaviness of the numb feeling, insecurity, just feeling like shit in overall, we went through it and it was the worst memory in both our lives, " yeosang chuckled bitterly, reminiscing the time where he and wooyoung would spend hours crying their eyes out, in each other’s embrace.

" going through depression when you're training to be an idol isn't really ideal, it's like a straight ticket to hell, " he continued, the first droplet of tear already making its presence down his cheek.

" but then we became each other's backbone. when i relapsed, he was there to aid my wounds and cuddle me to sleep. when he's working himself to the point of death, i'll be t-there for him to stop the music and let him cry to my c-chest, " yeosang choked out, hands already balled up in a fist remembering how broken wooyoung looked then. 

he couldn't continue due to his anxiety and the fat droplets of tears that were rolling down his cheeks. seonghwa who was next to him gently wrapped his arms around the younger, bringing the boy closer to him letting him cry out to his chest. 

" he was doing so well hyung. when he found out he had a chance in debuting, it was like a light sparked in his life.

he started setting boundaries to not overexert himself. he started feeling happy and positive and that's how he _helped_ me, " yeosang whimpers out all the while sniffling but everyone could hear him. 

" okay, i think that's enough. sang-ie, breathe okay? breathe for hyung, " 

  
  
  
  
  


when wooyoung woke up, it was to the sound of the kettle whistling which means someone was brewing tea in the kitchen. sitting up and stretching, he made his way to there, rubbing his eyes sleepily as he staggered to the fridge, in need of water to hydrate his parched throat. 

" oh hey _hyung_ , " he greeted san as he walked past the boy to retrieve a bottle of water. 

" hey young-ie, " came the soft reply along with the pat on his butt. that soft gesture caused wooyoung to giggle, making him spit out some of the water in surprise as san laughed along too.

as the younger went and retrieve a few napkins, san took that moment to observe his friend. he felt himself smile in relief when he saw the small smile etched on wooyoung’s face as he hummed along to the song playing in the radio. and oh how san _wished_ that the other could always be this happy because he truly deserves it.

“ you know we love you right, “ san starts and not even a second later he felt rather than heard the reply because wooyoung was already hugging him, head tucked under his chin as he wraps his arms around the older.

though startled, san returned the gesture along with a soft kiss to his forehead.

“ no matter how tough it gets, no matter how loud your thoughts are young-ie, we will always love you and be there to support you and guide you through, “ he says with a smile as he felt the nod against his chest. 


End file.
